In this age of doing 1000 things at a time, it’s a fact that we are living in distracted times.
Our phones are buzzing all the time with messages and notifications and our mind is programed to read and reply all the messages, the moment they arrive. We have simply forgotten how to be mindful and stay mindful.
If we try to live mindfully, there is so much this world has to offer. Being a mindful listener is one big step, to reach a state of mindful, blissful living.
Being a mindful listener, is an art. A good listener is always learning something.
Let’s go through a few ways, how we can get better in listening mindfully.
- Do not wait for your turn to answer: Stephen R. Covey, the author of” The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” states – “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” This is true for large part of today’s generation. We are only waiting for our turn to talk and are not interested in what the other person is talking about. To be a mindful listener, just listen. It’s that simple. Don’t think -next moment, don’t think- next question. Just be there, for the talker.
- Feel the connect with the speaker: Feel the connect with the speaker, when you are listening to him. Listen with an open mind. H/She is a different individual with different mindset and different experiences. Try to learn from his share of experiences. If you have listened mindfully, the talker will feel the connect with you, even if you do not have any comment or question after your conversation.
- Do not judge: Never judge the person you are talking with. Every individual is unique and every individual have their own battles and hardships. Do not form any opinion of the talker, which is unrelated to the conversation.
- Do not give suggestion or advise, if not being asked- It is most commonly seen that everyone becomes a therapist when they listen to someone else’s issues. If the other person needs an empathetic ear, provide them with one. If they are not asking for advise, do not give them free advise.
- Do not look forward for instances to boast about yourself. – The people who look forward in a conversation to just boast about themselves, cannot be a mindful listener because all they are thinking is, how they are better than everyone around. Leave the praising to other people. It is liberating when you do not have to prove to everyone, that how good you are.
Enjoy listening mindfully. Mindful conversations go a long way.